A Sydney Christmas

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A Sydney Christmas

We are focused on what to pack, the weather conditions,Christmas Letters from Santa Review the travel anxiety, and coordinating driving directions once we fly to our destination. I am worried about getting my luggage searched and security thinking my protein powder is anthrax! We will fly into Las Vegas on Christmas Eve, find a church for Mass, and hopefully get to sleep early.

We leave Vegas at 6 a.m. on Christmas day to drive 5 hours into Utah and we'll pick up Vanessa at hopefully noon. She is allowed a three day visit so we'll stay at a hotel about an hour from her program. I don't recall if I ever explained it, but she's in a specialty boarding school/treatment center in a very remote area of south central Utah. The setting is a 2,000 acre horse ranch in the mountains. When I chose the program, I didn't want her in a hospital setting. I really wanted her to be near nature, animals, and the outdoors. She always liked those things, prior to her diagnosis of manic-depression. Although, now, she claims she isn't interested in the animals or outdoor activities.

After our three days with her we'll take her back to the program and we're scheduled for a 2 hour therapy session with her and the therapist. Normally, our therapy with her is done weekly over the telephone - it actually works well. I'm nervous about the face to face one.After that, my husband, other daughter, and myself will drive 5 hours back to Vegas. We'll stay there for 3 more days and plan to spend each day hiking in the state parks near Vegas.

So, it is such a contrast right now - us doing and focusing on what we need to do and others doing and focusing on what they need to do. But somehow it feels better, although, I can't really explain how or why. It's like we can be in the middle of the store shopping for a backpack for hiking and surrounded by all the craziness - and it doesn't feel stressful.I feelwelldetached. In therapy, I was always told that "detached" is not good - and that made sense. But this kind of "detached" is a welcomed feeling. Being right in the middle of all the hustle and bustle and not feel hustled and bustled!

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